Every couple goes through rough patches, but issues like cheating and infidelity accusations can be exacerbated by BPD symptoms. How do you deal with someone who has BPD cheating signs? That is a question that will be addressed in this post.
The Concept Explanation of Borderline Personality Disorder and Cheating?
Dating someone with borderline personality disorder can be frustrating and difficult, and the likelihood of being cheated on is also there to deal with. The term “borderline personality disorder” (“BPD”) refers to a form of mental illness. A person who suffers from this condition may also be diagnosed with an emotionally unstable personality disorder. BPD patients struggle with mood swings and are prone to risky behavior.
In addition, they struggle to control their feelings and emotions. If you engage in borderline personality disorder constant cheating, you may struggle with the activities of everyday living, commitments, and important life events. You may have problems maintaining relationships and jobs. And to cope, you might turn to things like food, drink, deception, or other drugs.
How to Identify a Borderline Man or Woman?
Signs of borderline personality disorder relationships and cheating frequently emerge during adolescence in both men and women. The symptoms may be different for each individual.
The following are some physical and emotional cheating signs your BPD girlfriend is cheating on you:
- Abnormally high levels of rage and difficulty maintaining emotional control.
- Behavior is characterized by extreme shifts in mood that can last for hours or days.
- Close ties with family and friends can swiftly shift from affection to hostility.
- Exaggerated reactions to and fears of abandonment, as well as extraordinary measures used to prevent being abandoned.
- A fluctuating sense of identity might prompt a shift in one’s priorities, values, or actions.
- Displays some narcissist cheating signs.
- Addiction, overeating, unsafe sex with multiple partners and wasteful spending are signs of a BPD wife infidelity.
- Attempts at suicide or self-harm (such as pulling out hair, cutting, or burning).
However, it is important to note that the signs and symptoms of BPD are not always easy to spot.
Apparent BPD Cheating Signs
BPD and infidelity often work hand in hand with each other. Here are some obvious signs to help spot a borderline personality disorder spouse:
1. Partner with BPD Has Frequent Emotional Changes
Risky behavior may also result from a borderline personality disorder cheating spouse’s inability to control their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that having borderline personality disorder guarantees that a person will cheat, but there are warning signals that could make it more likely.
If your partner’s roller coaster becomes more regular and intense than usual, this could be an indication that they’re trying to escape the relationship and find fulfillment elsewhere.
2. A Partner with BPD Is Constantly Testing You 100%
Although it’s acceptable and romantic to put your spouse to the test every once in a while, if your borderline personality disorder spouse makes it a habit of continually texting you, they may try to hide their betrayal. They may try to reassure themselves that they still have control over you despite their infidelity.
3. Partner with BPD Suddenly Removes You from Instagram and Facebook Friends’ List
If your partner has BPD, you should be aware of the obvious signals that indicate they may be cheating on you. They may become more secretive, even going so far as to delete you from social media accounts like Instagram and Facebook.
4. Partner with BPD Disappears to New Places
Almost everyone lies occasionally. A red flag could be raised if your partner suddenly starts missing in areas you’ve never heard of. Ask them why they are suddenly being secretive about their location if they were previously forthcoming about it.
5. Your Relationship with Your BPD Partner Has Become Seemingly Short-Lived or Not Important at All
Your partner may be cheating if the relationship suddenly becomes short-lived or unimportant as the days go by. BPD cheating and lying habits are not difficult to spot, so if they start making excuses for why they can’t get out with you, this is a red flag.
If your partner usually is very open and talkative, any abrupt changes in behavior could indicate that they are trying to conceal something from you.
6. Your BPD Partner Is Unusually Sexually Active Toward You
Everybody gets attracted to their better half sexually, but when the drive increases, it could indicate that the BPD partner is hiding something. Sex can be a good way of distracting you from infidelity.
7. Your BPD Partner Has an Unknown Pattern of Behavior
Listen carefully to how they describe other people. If they start talking more frequently about someone else, it could be an indication that they have feelings for that person.
The second thing to keep in mind is how they act while they are in your presence. This could be among emotional cheating signs if they become distant or preoccupied. At this point, it’s most important to hear them out.
The Key Steps to Be Done If Your Partner Is Suffering from BPD and Is Cheating on You?
When your partner has BPD and is cheating on you, you should try as much as possible to talk to them about it. Borderline personalities have an extreme aversion to emotional intimacy and a crippling uncertainty about their worth. This leads to many relationship problems, including infidelity, alcoholism, and drug abuse.
Don’t give up on them too easily if you can help it. Psychotherapy, especially dialectical behavior therapy, is one option for helping them. Couples therapy can be a useful resource for understanding borderline personality disorder, analyzing the mindset of a cheating man, and finding effective solutions to the difficulties it creates in relationships.
Constantly and actively listening to and empathizing with a partner who has BPD is essential. In addition, it would be beneficial if you paid more attention to their feelings than their words.
The average duration of a BPD relationship among married or cohabitating couples was 7.3 years, according to research conducted in 2014. There are, however, examples of marriages that last for decades.
Emotional support seems to be the most important factor in a relationship for someone with BPD. Someone with a borderline personality disorder may have difficulty forming relationships due to their history. Extend tolerance and compassion to such a relationship. They have the potential to change for the better if allowed to learn.
A person suffering from BPD can have a healthy relationship if they receive therapy and have a strong social network of loved ones and friends. Agree it is enough to lightly refuse a person without considering in detail all the nuances of the relationship. For example, take into consideration only the facts that a certain zodiac sign is most likely to cheat, or the person with BPD necessarily implies signs of lying about cheating.
Your personality will determine the correct response. You should also give some thought to how you’re feeling emotionally. However, if you can stick by him and support him, you should do so.
Those who suffer from BPD respond very intensely to any form of rejection often. Due to this, they might not handle rejection the same way as the average person. This can cause them to act erratically and perhaps cheat in future relationships.
People with BPD sometimes tend to get overwhelmed by their imaginations and jealousy. This could be one of the many reasons a BPD partner constantly accuses you of cheating.
You should be on the lookout for numerous potentially toxic traits of BPD in your partner. However, the most popular sign is control behavior. If you don’t respond right away to a text, they may get frustrated and keep trying to get in touch with you until you respond. These actions could be the result of jealousy or a failure to trust, but they also may point to an underlying drive for power and dominance.
Daniela Gilbert is a relationship psychologist and author aged 31. She has a degree in clinical psychology from the University of Southern California and a social psychology Master’s and Ph.D. from the University of California, Santa Barbara. She is currently a postdoctoral fellow at UCSB.