It’s not all over the news, but women also cheat and, statistically speaking, almost to the same extent as men. You can learn to understand women who cheat and not invite trouble into your life.
Why Women Cheat
While women’s efforts to liberate themselves from male control and shift the dominance of traditional “man power” are making progress, it has also been reflected in how they see their own personal happiness. A modern woman is not just a wife constantly looking for a compromise – first of all, she requires emotional gratification and excitement. Do they want their sexual needs to be met in the best possible way? Like hell they do!
Otherwise, she will cheat. In the open, to finally break the bonds that do not allow her to breathe, or hiding, in an attempt to maintain the well-being of children and a positive image. Psychologists name so many reasons why women cheat, including lack of great attachment to a partner, low self-esteem, sexual incompatibility, lack of attention from a partner, and even revenge. But in truth, there’s so much more to that, and we’re missing the forest for the trees.
Facts About Cheating Women
Since most love affairs on the side involve sexual contact, it is generally believed that this is what the cheater is chasing. However, physical factors such as lack of passion and poor sexual chemistry are far from being the main causes of women’s infidelity. What pushes women to commit adultery is often more complex and deeper than it is in men. The reasons can be both internal and external, sometimes causing the woman seeking satisfaction elsewhere more suffering than pleasure.
Social Factors 🙋♀️
Humans are social animals; they are highly sensitive to what the community dictates to them. Modern society sees many boundaries have been pushed apart, and social conventions have acquired new interpretations. This is especially felt in urban areas where liberal views flourish. Finding themselves alone with their dissatisfaction and inability/unwillingness to fix shortcomings in their permanent relationships, it became easier for women to seek emotional or sexual interaction among acquaintances, colleagues, etc. The possibilities are, in fact, unlimited by anything other than the decision of the woman herself.
Neurological Factors 😰
Why, having virtually everything for happiness, did she turn out to be an unfaithful woman? What is going on in her head? The neurological factor has a connection with hormones and other reactions occurring in the body. When we fall in love, create a romantic union, and enjoy the initial stage of life together, chemicals in our brain such as epinephrine, dopamine, serotonin, and PEA are at their peak. Over time, the intensity of these neurotransmitters decreases to zero, and women, due to the lack of a strong bond and due to other difficulties in the relationship, may feel that love is gone.
Psychological Factors 😔
Seemingly normal from the outside, many of us hide a whole bunch of insecurities, traumas, and suppressed emotions at the very bottom of our souls. Needless to say, our psychological state is directly reflected in our actions – sometimes encouraging us to inflict pain and suffering through the actions that we ourselves once experienced.
These are some of the most common psychological facts about cheating woman that can be found here and there:
- fear of committing or reenacting abusive behavior due to childhood trauma (betrayal, one of the parents leaving the family, etc.).
- romanticization of relationships. Some women may not be psychologically mature enough to do their part of the job in a relationship and take it to the next level.
- lack of self-esteem is a common occurrence among those seeking extramarital romance. To prove their attractiveness, intelligence, and quirkiness without getting proper attention from their partner, women may try to refill the vessel of self-confidence on the side.
- feeling a lack of respect for her as a woman, dominating the role of a nanny for children, a cook for her husband, or a cleaner in the house.
Genetic Factors 🧬👵🏻
Our genes have something to say when it comes to cheating. While scientists are still exploring this phenomenon in more detail, there is a connection between the predisposition to cheating and the temperament we inherit from our parents. At the same time, it should be noted that behavior patterns women cheating in a relationship inherit from their caretakers have even a greater influence on them. However, having a special “gene for a thrill” does not mean that a woman is unable to control her impulses and will definitely deceive you.
22 Characteristics of a Cheating Woman
There is no need to be overly suspicious – just try to watch your missus so that the news of her betrayal does not come out of the blue. No matter how hard she tries, sooner or later, certain behavioral patterns will give her away.
#1 She Speaks Positively About Infidelity
When she talks about it jokingly, she may actually think about it seriously. Perhaps she witnessed betrayal more than once in her family or circle of friends and began normalizing such behavior. It is better to root out such talk until signs of infidelity become too obvious and make it clear that you are radically negative towards such maxims.
#2 She Often Plays the Victim
Playing the victim card helps a person avoid responsibility for their mischievous actions. The reluctance to take responsibility for what they did or just stop is so great that they don’t even hesitate to hurt you instead.
#3 A Woman Who Is Good at Lying
This is definitely a red flag that should not be ignored. Because one thing all cheaters have in common is their constant lies. You may begin to notice how she somehow manages to avoid answering your questions indirectly by sugarcoating and turning the conversation around. A person whose conscience is clear is unlikely to need to do this, especially in communication with a loved one.
#4 She Wants to Dominate the Relationship
If you got just such a partner, you would feel that you can no longer be yourself – your opinion will be taken into account less and less, and any initiative will be stopped. She is unlikely to worry about you getting hurt because of her infidelity. Her goal is to make herself happy and get as many trophies as possible to feel powerful.
#5 A Woman Who Constantly Walks Away from Confrontation
Why be so lost if she has nothing to hide? Of course, this is far from the most pleasant topic for conversation, and of course, she would prefer that it has never taken place. Perhaps she will take a highly defensive position or suddenly pretend to be super busy – an unnatural reaction is easy to recognize.
#6 She Is Always Shifting the Blame
This is one of the most common signs your girlfriend is cheating – she will try to blame you at any opportunity. Moreover, this might happen in situations where she had not exactly paid attention to it before. Perhaps she feels guilty for an act she has already committed, or she is just setting the stage to make you guilty of everything, even her adultery.
#7 A Girlfriend Who Cheats for Emotional Reasons
If her emotional flame has gone, it means that she is the woman most likely to cheat and will become more and more distant, including in intimate terms. She wants to feel wanted and appreciated, and often women cheat on those with whom they manage to establish good emotional relationships.
#8 She Easily Breaks Taboos
The veil of love gradually dissipates, and you clearly see that it is too “wild” for you. Yes, she knows how to spice things up, but she also has no idea how to stop. Planning something with a girl with such a temperament is not possible – unless, of course, you are ready to be abandoned when she finds herself a new hero-lover.
#9 She Has a Different Social Life
This should alert you. Why does she refuse to introduce you into her social circle? It is quite possible that this is one of the signs wife likes another man and does not want you to encounter. However, we are talking about artificially created isolation; otherwise, everyone can communicate with people in their circle of interests.
#10 An Overly Demanding Girlfriend
If she constantly demands something from you without giving anything in return, she may just be using you, looking for a replacement for you, or already having one. A person who is truly in love will be ready to share the last – don’t wait long if you do not want this to be a one-sided game.
#11 Jealous Type of Woman
Be wary of the fact that your significant other is acting overly jealous. This may be one of the characteristics of a cheating woman when she tries to mess with your brain and claim that you have driven her into infidelity with your “frequent” philandering adventures.
#12 She Is Afraid of Commitment
This mental attitude makes it difficult to maintain a long-term and healthy relationship. There are frequent cases when it is difficult for a woman to trust again if she was betrayed. Then you will have to work hard to win her trust. Or maybe she still wants to have some fun before settling down for a serious relationship.
#13 Women with Low Self-Esteem
Trying to assert yourself at the expense of others becomes even more perverted when it comes to seduction to boost self-esteem. Once she found everything she wanted in you – now she’s craving someone else to validate her, and it won’t stop anytime soon.
#14 Sexually Unsatisfied All the Time
Although she may last for a while being sexually unsatisfied, it still means that sooner or later, she will leave you or start experimenting on the side. Bad sex is at the top of the reasons why women cheat – maybe you should try to understand what SHE likes.
#15 She Has Many Friends Among Other Men
It certainly shouldn’t sound strange to have male acquaintances – but you should be alerted by how enthusiastically she prefers the company of a male friend to yours. It will look at least strange if she meets with them without your presence. If she wants to be only yours, then she will change her behavior for the better.
#16 She Works Late at Night
Your loved one, who has never had a penchant for overworking before, suddenly began to regularly stay late “at work” – this is one of the signs she’s cheating, especially when paired with a constant rejection of intimacy with you.
#17 She Is a Narcissist
The person who loves herself more than anything in the world will most likely make you unhappy – you will be trying to change her in vain. Most likely, even before the moment of her cheating, you will feel somewhere on the sidelines but definitely not in her priority.
#18 Not Interested in Long-Term Plans
You have every right to know how long she intends to be in the boat with you. If your even infrequent attempts to start a conversation about a common future annoy her, or she keeps silent, most likely she’s one of those women who cheat, and you will soon be the only one at the helm of your ship.
#19 She’s an Overbearing Sociopath
Being a sociopath means not being able to stop until the person does everything the way they want. They often hide behind fake identities to lure you into their snares. But they cannot keep a good face for a long time – the desire to manipulate, as well as the lack of empathy, will manifest itself very quickly.
#20 She Has a Problem with Addictions
Under the influence of substances, it is difficult for a person to maintain a sober mind – a very high percentage of women cheating abuse alcohol, drugs, and so on. It will be almost impossible for you to trust such a person – but you can try to overcome her addiction together once and for all.
#21 A Woman Who Likes to Have Too Much Fun
You fell in love with her contagious laugh, and you have something to remember from the noisy parties where you went together. However, if she prefers to spend most of her time being tipsy while easily flirting with the men around, this is a wake-up call for you. Perhaps she is not mature enough, but that means that nothing serious will come of it.
#22 She Is Often Fixated on Appearances
Women are well aware that men love with their eyes and take the opportunity to emphasize their charms to impress the object of desire. Oops, didn’t she dress up like that for you? Well, it may well be time for you to become more vigilant.
Do Women Cheat More Than Men?
The numbers still speak in favor of women, and it will take them more time (if ever) to catch up with men. Recent statistics show that infidelity among men and women tends to reduce the previously existing large gap between the two sexes. And the number of cheating women has increased significantly even compared to a few decades ago – by a whopping 40%.
How to Catch a Cheating Woman?
It can be very difficult to catch a married woman or a girl cheating, because, most likely, she has already thought through all the options in case you are snooping around. If you see signs your wife is cheating, do not rush to lament.
From one method to another, you will be able to find a weak point and get hard evidence to confront her:
- First, make sure that at least a few characteristics from this article match the behavior of your missus. Then begin to act.
- Get where you can. Secretly check her gadgets for suspicious calls, chats, and applications. Don’t forget about her browser history.
- For partners of especially vigilant ladies, there is an offer of apps for monitoring locations, chats, and calls. You can also get the use of free location services like Find My iPhone.
- Drop by for a surprise visit to her school or work or meet her after her extra activities or hobbies.
FAQ about cheating woman
Her behavioral patterns change dramatically. She may become more secretive, withdraw emotionally from you, or act overly nice to you. All this can also be accompanied by frequent outings and a sudden lull in your sex life.
Depending on the types of cheating in a relationship – emotional, physical, or both – a woman may feel guilty in different ways. In some cases, she will try to cajole you or manipulate you into putting the blame on you.
No. Women statistically cheat less than men, and not even all men cheat. Girls may have some psychological, social, and other reasons for being unfaithful. But by no means should you be completely disappointed in relationships, even if you failed.
Perhaps it’s time for you to become more attentive if your wife suddenly has a lot of secrets from you. Red-flag alerts for you might be a change in behavior to more toxic, her unwillingness to make eye contact with you, meetings or activities that prevent you from spending time together, just to name a few.
It all depends on her temperament and your relationship. Some women may suffer and be tormented by remorse for what they have done. Others drastically change their habits, improve their appearance, and try to look better.
Figures show that only 13% of married women confessed to adultery, while for men, the figure is 20%. Interestingly, the most common female fidelity-breaker in the US is a cheating mature wife in her 60s.
It’s hard to single out just one thing all cheaters have in common. And yet, the art of lying allows them to commit adultery and stay afloat for the time being like nothing else.
Daniela Gilbert is a relationship psychologist and author aged 31. She has a degree in clinical psychology from the University of Southern California and a social psychology Master’s and Ph.D. from the University of California, Santa Barbara. She is currently a postdoctoral fellow at UCSB.