While living with your spouse or loved one under the same roof, you’re growing on each other so much that you may not notice that they are playing a double game. But if you look at the common signs someone is lying about cheating, which will be discussed in this article, perhaps the scales will fall from your eyes.
How to Tell If Your Partner Is Lying About Cheating
Men are from Mars, and women are from Venus – this is true, indeed; not in a literal sense, of course, but we are entirely different in our requirements and expectations in a relationship. Besides innate inclinations, one can also add norms and expectations imposed by society. So what are the differences between men and women lying about cheating?
🙆♂️ Is He Lying About Cheating?
While various studies suggest different facts about which of the sexes lies more, it has been proven that men are better at hiding the truth. If you believe that you have a good relationship, then it would never occur to you that your loved one is cheating on you, right? Well, here’s where the hitch is.
Even the happy and beloved husband lies and cheats simply because… the opportunity presents itself. They may not seek deep emotional contact with women on the side but simply do it to satisfy sexual urges. However, in most cases, they do not want to end the relationship with the primary partner.
👧 Is She Lying About Cheating?
Women lie less about cheating. Your wife or girlfriend may not be interested in lying after infidelity if the man she met has demonstrated better commitment and emotionally suits her. Thus, women are more likely to cheat on their partners because they feel unsatisfied with the current relationship and may decide to withdraw willingly. At the same time, men may be completely uninterested in leaving their permanent partner.
Psychology Behind Cheating and Lying
Despite the different prerequisites for cheating, you can notice some general signs of a cheater and liar that lives next to you. While we all tell petty lies, sometimes doing it for good, as they say, there is a difference in how we feel and start to behave if we cross that fine line somehow. People cope with the need to hide the whole truth differently, and in most cases, everything is written in their faces.
10 Signs of a Cheater and Liar in a Relationship
Even if you’re dealing with a person with a black belt in lying and cheating, they can’t hide forever. Look out for a combination of the following cheating spouse signals and look further into it.
1. Absence of Eye Contact While Talking
If you are trying to remember the last time you had face-to-face conversations between you, try to do so soon. You don’t need to stare at your woman or man as if waiting for them to say something – it will rather confuse them, even if they are innocent.
Try to convey love and care through your glance, which can make them involuntarily think about what they did, at that moment or after a while. What’s more, it may seem to you that they begin to avoid looking at you – again, to avoid eye contact or because they feel uncomfortable in your presence out of guilt.
2. A Decline in Sexual Activity
Has it been a long time since you were close? A man’s lack of sexual attraction to his partner is one of the most apparent signs of lying about cheating and having an affair on the side. Let’s stop right there for a minute – also allow for the possibility of having some health issues he doesn’t want to admit to. If this doesn’t prove true over time, look at his strange behavior in other aspects. Also, some men’s sexual appetites can rise if a femme fatale drives them crazy – so don’t be fooled.
If you want to know if your wife is lying about cheating, pay attention to how she perceives your touch, whether your hugs are pleasant, and whether she looks interested when you show her attention. Her persistence in discarding your approaches should sooner or later lead you to take the initiative and talk to her about how things are – probably, she’s just dissatisfied with the lack of intimacy or support on your side.
3. Their Workday Became Lengthy
Life is becoming increasingly chaotic, and a working person seems to run without stopping in a hamster wheel. A convenient excuse when a girl or boyfriend is lying about cheating. So when you call them late when they are supposed to be “working” and they don’t pick up, it’s very suspicious.
4. Frequent Change of Topics in Conversation
If you want to deliberately talk about something related to the topic of cheating to see their reaction, the main thing is not to overdo it with clear hints. Do you want your conversation to be about the situation in your relationship? Your unfaithful partner may not only try to change the subject but will ask you cheating questions too. They may begin to “suspect” you, ask you to leave them alone, and all in that vein.
5. Trying to Act Hidden with the Phone
Usually, it all depends on what kind of cheating your sweetheart can be involved in. They can do without calls and chats when it comes to an affair with a colleague, for example, whereas online cheating involves:
- creating an online dating account and using a smartphone
- setting passwords
- being attached to the gadget more than usual
- nervous or suspicious behavior
6. Stories Became Superficial, Without Details
Before your partner or spouse starts building walls, when you ask well-founded questions, they will feed you tales of unexpected meetings, job assignments, events where they can’t take you for some reason, and so on. Lying to tell a whole story is much more difficult than just keeping quiet, so use this as a means to catch a cheater.
7. Defensive Training on Any Topic
Let’s look at how an innocent person would react to accusations of lying and cheating – their conscience is clear, they know it, so they have nothing to worry about, unlike a cheater who is overly defensive. So first, they will try to understand the facts you are suggesting, and most likely, they will be able to prove that this is a misunderstanding. Secondly, they wouldn’t snap at you all of a sudden but genuinely try to understand what they can do better so that you’re not worried so much.
8. Body Language: Folded Hands, Sweat on Forehead, etc.
Some people just can’t hide it – as ironic as it sounds, consider yourself lucky. Body language is most eloquent about lying after infidelity, so you can explore the topic more deeply. Nervous chuckles, slight trembling, jerky body movements – perhaps they need just one little push to confess everything.
9. No Previous Trust or Affection
People with a history of infidelity in their past relationships may seem like an attractive choice for those who, by all means, decide to bind this person to themselves. Your relationship should have mutual respect and affection. If you don’t set clear boundaries that should never be crossed, you will bite your elbows when you see your boyfriend or girlfriend is lying about cheating, and history will most likely repeat itself.
10. Sharp and Unreasonable Irritability
When involved with someone other than their permanent partner, the cheater can go a little overboard when answering your questions by being overly aggressive. It is not clear who they are angry at – you who ask the right questions or themselves for not being able to resist the temptation – but such is the psychology behind cheating and lying. They have something to lose, and the fear of losing it wakes up in them when confronted at an unexpected moment.
How to Catch Someone in a Lie About Cheating
Be ready to watch your loved one in their moments of vulnerability – for example, after a glass or two of wine. Also, cheaters often confess when you support them in a difficult moment – you just need to make them spill the beans relieving the heavy burden off their hearts. Also, there is a wide variety of online apps to catch a cheater – they are worth your salt if you are sure of your suspicions, but there is no other way to prove your point.
Mark Wilson is a relationship coach and an author aged 39. He was born on May 12, 1983, in San Francisco, California, where he grew up in a middle-class family comprising his parents and two siblings. Wilson’s father was a renowned businessman, and his mother a homemaker. Mark went to the local high school in his hometown and later attended college at the University of California, Berkeley. He majored in psychology and also took some courses in relationship coaching.